The Power Imbalance and Underestimation of Threats in Couples with Anger Management Issues
This article is about what to do when a partner threatens to leave or left and it involves anger management issues.
Ongoing arguments in a couple, that are repeated and chronic can leave both or one partner with anger management issues and a sense of hopelessness of little or no hope of a light at the end of the tunnel. As the time goes on, couples or one of the persons in the couple with poor communication style and conflict resolution skills can in a state of despair resort to threats of ‘I will leave you‘ or ‘I will divorce you‘. Clients often report that feeling threatened with a divorce impeded their assessment of seriousness of the situation and describe in the sessions a shock of arriving to an empty home, discovering the partner left. The morale of this story is, if you have been accused of having anger management issues or domestic violence, take threats in relationship seriously. Try to take into consideration that a person who has been suffering in silence, may have been lacking a confidence to engage in long-term disagreements, may have been frightened of your aggression and might only gather courage when reaching the breaking point in other words resorting to threats. A number of years of unhappiness, may preceded the breaking point, when the pain and fear of speaking and believing in you, becomes grater than the pain of changing.
There is a Hope to Revive Love Killed
The good news is that, many but not all of Anger Therapy London clients who completed anger management sessions and felt threatened with separation or divorce, were asked to leave marital home or prosecuted for domestic violence managed to revive the love killed and became amorous. The reconciliation and the revival of love in a high-conflict couple or in cases of clients with anger management issues may be attributable to a few factors. In a couple where trust has been broken, a person with anger management issues or someone accused of domestic violence, may have awakening moment, seeing their partner and family at the centre of their happiness and will seek to restore trust and to provide tangible evidence and as opposed to empty promises. The tangible evidence being a proof of attendance of the anger management sessions and consistently positive results in tensed conversations over a longer period of time. All this usually leads to safety, more openness, trust restoration and rebonding. How wonderful is that, isn’t it?
The process requires collaboration from the other partner which would include capacity to forgive, patience, recognition to understand that where there is a will there is a possibility to change. Maturity to acknowledge that maybe anger management tools and conflict resolution skills is not something that we are born with but equipped with through trial and error experiences and with support of anger management therapist. If you feel affected by this article and would like to schedule anger management sessions please contact t Leona Sears on 07505 124 933.